Me and my drinking… Ed Byrne

With countless sell-out tours and a regular slot on TV panel shows including the BBC’s Mock the Week, Ed Byrne is a stalwart of the UK’s comedy circuit. The self-confessed “miserable old git” shares some of his observations about drinking

Tell us about the first drink you ever had.

The first alcoholic drink I can remember really enjoying was Bacardi and Coke. Having been a big fan of Coke on its own, I was surprised to find that the addition of Bacardi actually improved the flavour.

Before going on stage, do you ever have a wee tipple to settle your nerves?

It’s not really about settling the nerves, it’s more a case of loosening up a bit. I generally have a pint or two of beer before going on stage and almost always bring a beer on with me to drink throughout the act.

Any tips and remedies for a morning after a night of excess?

I’m a big fan of Alka-Seltzer for the morning after. Also keep telling yourself that the feeling of impending doom will eventually lift and you will feel like yourself again tomorrow.

If you were a drink, what would you be and why?

I’d be Murphy’s stout. You know. Not the really famous Irish one. The other Irish one!

Your new show is about embracing your forties. How have your drinking habits changed over the years?

They’ve definitely become more sophisticated. I’ve switched from lager to ale, and I’ve gone from Jack Daniels and Coke to neat Scotch. The other big difference is that when you’re younger you’re more likely to talk up how much you drink: “I must have had 20 pints last night. I was mullered!”, whereas when you get older you tend to play it down more: “Of course I wasn’t drunk, I just had a couple of beers.”

You’ve toured lots of countries and have also made TV programmes in places like Siberia. What’s the strangest drink you have ever tried on your travels?

I once got, I’m not sure if drunk is the right word, altered shall we say, on kava while I was in Fiji. It’s made by adding powdered kava root to water. It’s a bit like drinking very runny plaster of paris. The effect is strangely anaesthetic. Bits of you go numb. You also have to drink quite a lot of it to feel any effect.

And what have you learned about drinking over the years?

Moderation is key!

Tell us about the worst hangover you have ever had.

That was probably while I was at college. I got drunk on Gin and Tonic. It remains the only time I have ever gotten drunk on gin. I started to get rolling vision like somebody had messed with the vertical hold in my head. I threw up every hour on the hour for the next 16 hours. The worst hangovers are the ones that won’t let you sleep through them. You just have to sit there until you feel well enough to go back to bed.

You’ve performed at the Edinburgh Fringe many times. Where do you go for a quiet pint to escape the crowds?

The bar at the Hotel du Vin is generally pretty quiet and they have a good selection of single malts. I also visited a great little late-night boozer called the Wally Dug this year. They were most hospitable.

Who’s the funniest person you’ve had the pleasure to prop up a bar with?

The bloke who is supporting me on tour, Ben Norris, is a very funny person to have a drink with. He’s funny on stage too, but he really comes into his own afterwards.

Comedians have a reputation for being a bit competitive – does this extend to their boozing?

Not when it comes to how much you can drink. There’s no point trying to compete when there are so many functioning alcoholics on the comedy scene. Where we are more likely to become competitive would be in how much we know about wine or whisky or real ale. If I got together with somebody else who enjoyed single malt, for instance, we’d probably try to outdo each other over what the most expensive or oldest whisky we’d ever drunk or owned was.

You once joked that shopping for booze with your girlfriend is a great thing to do together. What booze would we find in your shopping trolley?

Innis & Gunn beer, Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, and a bottle of Balvenie DoubleWood. That’s a good night in, right there.

As a condemned man, awaiting your fate, what would your last drink be, and why?

Probably, a lot of gin and tonic. I’d make myself so sick I’d be begging them to kill me.



Leave your comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *